Autism Dating Site – Asperger Dating Site and Friendship Site › Forums › Dating with Asperger’s › I find people off the spectrum lie too much
Tagged: dating spectrum lies lying, female, male, sexes
I find this a problem too but I thought it was just me. I can’t respect people who lie a lot, especially the ones who lie to themselves- who are they fooling?Seems odd they don’t realise that down the line it won’t help them. It’s so nice to realise there are other people who feel the same way.
Hello,
I think growing up the thing that both children and adults seemed to resent in me was my refusal to lie. It’s not like I’m incapable (although as a child perhaps I was) but I just don’t see it as healthy, or as necessary as neurotypicals seem to think it is. In my opinion, most people who lie do it because they’re afraid to face the truth or because in that moment it’s easier to deal with/ makes them look good. I’ve always pushed my family to be honest and it’s not always been appreciated, but at least when they interact with me they know who I am. One thing I’ve found is that people are easily embarrassed and so if you lead with a similar mistake etc on your part then they’re more likely to admit to their own mistakes rather than denying they made any… just in case that helps others here. I used to be more judgmental but since early 20s have realised compassion for what others may find difficult – in this case, blunt honesty, is more encouraging and helpful. People are much more likely to be real if they feel there’s acceptance there.
on this point “I have always been very sensitive to lying. I know how to lie but prefer to find people that can handle the truth and because of my ASD I don’t emotionally react to things so I would people be truthful and just work through consequences. I have a hard enough tying to read people when they’re telling the truth.
Anyone else struggle with this?” all i can say is welcome to the wold of man where lying is all you are going to get in my Esperance
I agree, it is also very hard for me to lie too
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