Autism Dating Site – Asperger Dating Site and Friendship Site › Forums › Dating with Asperger’s › When is the right time to mention Asperger's? › Reply To: When is the right time to mention Asperger's?
sooo. I just recently started telling new friends that I am an aspie. I have been becoming more authentic and real to my self… I was hiding who I was for way too long. I have been making lots of new friends and discovering that the people I am drawn to (geeky, creative, artistic, theatrical, etc.)- some of them also happen to be aspie… or on the lgbtqia spectrum… and when they confide in me that they are (trans, gay, bisexual, living with a chronic or mental illness, or also aspie) then I feel comfortable sharing that I have my own secret, being an aspie. I guess you could say that I am living in the aspie closet, it is just safer for me that way. Being a sweet, kind, generous female, I find that alllllll the wrong people find me. I don’t think they know that I am aspie, but I do know they see something in me that they want to …. mm… I lose words… they want to… it starts with an M, ..
Well anyways, I find that it is better to only confide in people I know I can trust… That I don’t have to worry that they will tell people… Since they have their own secret, or issue, or whatever, then it is more equal I guess.
So in answer to your question, Liam, sorry it’s been the long version… Maybe wait until AFTER you meet in person? If you put all your interests and hobbies out there on your profile and you find someone interesting that shares some of those hobbies, after you get to know the person for a while, like 2-10 dates/outings/hangout sessions, you can let them know you are aspie..
I try to bring up the subject and see what the other person will say. Like almost code words… I will bring up my favorite aspie books, or movies, and ask if they have read or seen it? and if they did, and liked it, then I might drop in the fact…
ME: “One of my favorite movies is MOZART & THE WHALE… Have you seen that movie?”
FRIEND: “Oh, yeah, that was a cool movie. That was about Asperger’s, right…? My little brother has that…”
ME: “Oh, that must be interesting…”
FRIEND: “Yeah, I love my little brother so much, he can be a bit annoying with some of his behaviors, but you, know, it’s just something he has…”
ME: “Oh… I’m an aspie too…”
FRIEND: “Oh, cool…”
ME: “Alright, see you later in class…”
FRIEND: “Cool, yeah, see you later…”