Reply To: Finally I am taking a ASD assessment

[Wendin]

Time flies. It has been over a year since I received my ASD diagnosis. A while ago on a Discord server someone who got a late ASD diagnosis told me it took him more or less a decade to fully accept his Autism. I chuckled. Now I am afraid that it may take me longer to accept my condition. It’s ironic. Recently I have come to terms with the possibility that I may not end up being with a human companion…hopefully, with a few cute animal companions. It’s not a joke but I can’t help smiling. It is true that all my life I have tried way too hard to be liked and attempted to blend in the NTs’ world. I am so tried of pretending to be “normal” and wearing a NT mask that never fits me well. To be honest, I think I have maxed out my human relationship potentials. As I get older, it also appears to be harder for me to go out of my way to make more-than-friends (don’t get me start to talk about the time that I tried using dating apps…so energy consuming and meaningless). Then career-wise, I guess, that’s where I need to look into my potentials. I am scared of maths and logical thinking. Now I am learning computer programming. My skills are not solid yet. God knows how long it will take me to finish creating a portfolio to get a tech job. However, I am proud of myself just for daring to try something different: I quit a customer service job at a non-profit and got another customer service job in the corporate world. Then I started learning more about accessibility in web design…and I joined a volunteer group to advocate for immigrants with disability. So, me, on a new phase: accepting more challenges and getting ready to do more self care and self growth.